Why Fucking Up is an Important part of the zen life!

I’m a screw up.  I can be a glutton.  I can over exercise.  I am obsessive.  I Fuck Up regularly at life.

In this world of Social Media giving us access to view our families, friends and total strangers’ lives, we have become accustomed to seeing the filtered version.  Where once our “best behaviour” was reserved for those rare family gatherings, remember your mother giving you and your siblings the pep talk in the car before entering such a gathering “Now you lot better be on your best behaviour in here or you’ll taste the back of my hand”, no?  It must have just been my family’s kind of pep talk!

But the point being, we now see only a snippet and a well groomed version of everyone.  It is rare to see a persons real life published freely for those to see.  There is a scary trend amongst the youth of today, it is called “Being Insta Ready”.  Yup, it is a real thing.  One must now, prepare oneself for the day ahead in the event that one is to post on Instagram!  I must be getting old, because that seems bonkers to me.

I am here to tell you that being normal IS OK!!

It is ok to not apply makeup everyday, it is ok to mutter “oh for fucks sake” when your partner, kids, friends, colleagues are pissing you off.  We don’t have to filter our lives day in and day out. Sure, be kind wherever and whenever possible but trying to be picture perfect, trying to keep up with your neighbours and friends, trying to out perform yourself at every turn is STRESSING YOU OUT!

Please just stop it! 

Before the modern age developed into the technology driven fast pace environment we live in now, there were fewer stressors in our daily lives.  Yes, being hunted by predators (not the alien kind) was part and parcel of life back then but if you were to be hunted and chased the stress of it was pretty short lived and our ancestors would have a quick adrenaline spike, they would fight or flight and then return to a pretty chilled out state of being.
In todays, world we encounter stressors moment to moment, you get up, check your phone and find a shitty text, email, Facebook, Twitter or Instagram post, you immediately get a stress response.  You rush to get your kids to school and one or all of them are being “difficult” (we refer to these “difficult” moments as “pitching a shit fit” in our house), this stresses you out. You drive to work or wherever and encounter dopey ass drivers or a traffic jam, you stress out further, your work stresses you, you’re still receiving shitty emails, text messages and you are still reading and re-reading social media posts that give you a blood pressure problem.  Then you sit-down at the end of the day, a day of constant adrenaline highs and you collapse into a heap with thoughts of “I ate like an asshole today because I was so stressed out”, these thoughts turn to “I must eat better, I am fat, I am lazy, I am not enough”.

When I said JUST STOP IT earlier, I mean it.  There are so many things in your daily life that do not need to stress you out and this constant state of elevated adrenaline and cortisol is ruining your health, it is shortening your lifespan and ultimately the reason you may be experiencing health issues, gut problems and poor sleep.

Things to cut out:

  • Checking social media and your phone in general upon waking and during the day. Remove apps from you phone that tempt you to look.  You only harm yourself.
  • Be early.  Get up a little earlier, leave home earlier, start a project earlier to finish earlier.  Giving yourself a little bit of extra time is a magical thing, you find yourself feeling much calmer when you are not in constant rush or feeling of being on the back foot, which creates a feeling of stress.
  • Plan ahead.  Walk through your day tomorrow in your head before your settle down for the night.  Consider timings and jobs/tasks that need to be sorted, write them down.  Failing to plan = Planning to fail.
  • Acknowledge that you will encounter ASSHOLES.  It is a sad fact but a fact all the same, we are surrounded by people who will annoy us and guess what?  You too, as am I, are an ASSHOLE.  Someone you encounter today will find you and me annoying as fuck.  It is life and it is solely on you to remember and tell yourself, that someone else’s actions only affect you and your stress levels if you let it.  So in the words of Queen Elsa “let it go, let it go”.

Don’t fall victim to these stressors daily.  Don’t try to be picture perfect.  Be yourself, your normal fucked up self, protect your health by being authentic and real.  Stressing about these things will ultimate kill you and the life you are living between now and death will be a miserable one.

Thanks for reading and LET IT GO, LET IT GO……

Kel xo

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